The 777: 7 Days, 7 LBS Down; 7 Days to Go

I made it a full week!

The Last Supper Dogg. For this week, anyway.

Saved by the Bell. i mean...DWTS should have had Kelly Kapowski on this season too. THAT would be a dance off.

i feel cleaner and like i'm really clearing out a bunch of cobwebs; both physically and mentally with my body running on clean energy. and though i lost different amounts of weight on different days, i netted out by losing a little over one LB a day. (btw's, i don't know why i keep typing LB instead of saying POUND, but in case you are confused, that's what i mean).

i have to say that with the exception of the first 2 days of the cleanse, today has been the most difficult day. it's sunday, and tomorrow i have to go back to 2 full days of just purees (no solid meals :/ ). so, just the thought of that is difficult. then there's the fact that usually on the weekends i will cook or try to make something for dinner for my boyfriend and myself, or us and some friends, just to have a Sunday Dinner/Lunch (it's a British thing).

i was afraid to leave the house for any real social plans, because i didn't feel confident enough around, like, baguettes and jam, or eggs. or way too many glasses of prosecco. so the only thing that i allowed myself to do was to go see Gravity on 3d IMAX at Citywalk. (sidebar: it's a great film, cinematically. some parts i was like ok, srsly? but those parts were still good too. i highly recommend seeing it in IMAX 3d if you can-it was worth it. ps-i do not, nor have i ever, had the desire to travel into space. despite my love of Star Trek and Star Wars.)

we all know what going to the movies is about...snacks that you would never get anywhere else. usually, i opt for nachos and a coke or cheree icee. i don't eat either of these things anywhere other than the movies. so that was quite the hurdle to clear. i knew that i wasn't going to get either of these things today due to the cleanse, so instead i did treat myself to a Coke Zero. mind you, i gave up drinking soda about 6 months ago and basically just drink water, tea and coffee now, so i allotted myself something to feel like i was getting a treat from the concession stand. and i tell ya that coke zero was SWEET. like super sweet! my tastebuds were so shocked by it that i couldn't even finish it.

so i got through the movie, and then got home and had a great meal from my cleanse today. it was a tilapia with a rice concoction and some wilted spinach and then some sort of kraut-esque stuff on top. i ate every single last grain on the plate. i realized that i've also really missed cooking and i've had some organic carrots, broccoli and squash/yams that were about to go bad and my boyfriend basically doesn't eat if i don't cook (it's a compliment, not a mandatory). so i decided that i'd make up a broccoli soup for him using some chicken stock, the carrots, half an onion, some garlic, fresh thyme, and then also made him some mashed yams with rosemary, butter and brown sugar as a side. i can very proudly say that i made it through cooking both of these dishes that took a few steps each with only about 2 tastings...and only of the soup, to make sure the seasonings weren't off (i made him taste the yams and tell me what to add). since i don't use cream in my soups and it's basically a broth with broccoli addded in at the end and pureed, i actually think it was very close to the PureedLove soups that i'm eating, so i didn't feel terrible for tasting 2 teaspoons of the green goodness that i made. and i got to cook, which satiated me for a little while, though now i have cleanup to do and i'm hungry. :/

so that was this weekend. how was yours?

Lastly, for anyone who is interested, here is the actual form that you fill out for the cleanse once you're signed up. you pick from these categories, and i've decided to switch it up for week two...no matter how good a pumpkin or cauliflower soup is, i just cannot eat it for 14 days straight. (variety is the spice of pureed life, amirite?) i had to turn in any changes to my choices by EOD friday, and i opted for asparagus, sweet pea (recommended highly by my co-worker who's done this cleanse), swapped to white bean from the black bean (again, you just can't eat poop-soup for 14 days straight) and got the ginger beet soup. i'm excited to try new variations...i hope i like them!

Potpourri for Day 6, Alex. (7 LBS LOST!)

where is this on the pyramid of #self-actualization? ok i don't NEED liquor, but gosh it's nice once a week.

I've decided since it's the weekend, i'm going to give all of us a break and only blog once a day. i'm also going to use these weekend posts as a repository for the deeper, more philosophical thoughts about food, emotions (for which i hope you will join me in the comments) and other info about the cleansing process that i've been thinking about during the week, but didn't fit into my other posts. so the weekend blogs shall henceforth be known as "Potpourri Posts," in the style of Jeopardy. and so it was.

1. First off, i've lost 7 LBS. so there's that.

2. Secondly, and total sidebar here, but have you watched Orphan Black on BBC America? it is AMAZEBALLS. if you have, don't tell me what happens. i'm getting through season 1 on DVD right now. ERMERGHERD ERTS SER GHERD. but, if you have watched it, does anyone know why the eff it didn't get nominated for ANY Emmys?! Tatiana Maslany plays EIGHT characters. EIGHT.

Tatiana in 6 of 8 characters...MAIN characters she plays. often in scenes with herself. DUDE.

3. Third, some strange thoughts about food in general. Allow me to expand.

it's so weird, but i'm not craving any specific food, although i feel bound by this cleanse (and i am bound by it, because i made a commitment to it, so i'm not even entertaining the thought of "cheating" on it. i agreed at the onset with full disclosure that if there was to be a diversion, champagne would be my ONLY deviation. and so it was). anyhow, since i'm not craving any specific type or even an item of food, this simple fact helps to eliminate a lot of food "noise" from my head.

and it leaves me with this big, gaping hole of an epiphany that i wrote about slightly in an earlier blog...just about how emotional food is. i would be lying if i said that i'm not totally in a tizzy about what the hell, exactly, i'm going to start eating and stop eating when i come off this cleanse. i can't have food delivered to my doorstep forever, right? while thinking about what my first "free" meal will be post-cleanse, i found myself at a complete and utter standstill.

(photo from my series of original photography in Downtown Los Angeles' Grand Central Market. For the full series click here.)

i don't know what i WANT to eat. for the first time since i can remember in my state of being a sentient being. i don't crave any certain thing, nor do i like the sound of a greasy, pepperoni pizza, even though i LOVE pepperoni pizza. i like this CLEAN feeling of my body, but i don't like the lack of control or just being able to go out to a restaurant and even order light fare. i just can't do ANY of it now, which is, of course, the intentionally strict part of this cleanse. i imagine if we were left to our own devices to make these soups and meals (which is doable-they aren't super complex) we would likely mis-measure here, sub in some EVOO there, add a dash of something here, blah blah blah...just so that we could break the rules, in some teeny, tiny, miniscule way. and we'd think that this was somehow liberating us...somehow helping assert ourselves as our own person, totes in control of our own life because we EAT WHAT WE WANT, WHEN WE WANT, DAMMIT! but therein lies the whole irony: it's only hurting us. that mind fuck i talked about earlier about food being emotional...control is emotional. breaking the rules is emotional. it makes us FEEL an emotion, and food is the enabler that lets us do it.

so there you have my totally free-falling thoughts on the subject, as of now. like my general creative process has always been -- whether for my personal art or for high-level strategy and brainstorm at work, or even when i'm faced with a problem or a difficult decision -- i have always used one method, one point of origin, for attacking it. i take whatever it is that i'm facing or feeling, and i deconstruct it. disassemble it down to it's most minute of parts, and then, i try to put it back together again, and see if i can riff or make variations or adjustments that will make it better, or different in a better way better suited to my particular need for the situation.

i feel like i have sufficiently deconstructed the idea of food and control, and want vs. need, and have started to scratch the surface of what it is that we tend to be hungry FOR, and now, i have the next 8 days -- and you guys -- to help me figure out exactly how to reassemble how i eat and behave around food. so here we go!

New cleanse-related items on tomorrow's agenda to address in my END OF THE WEEK! blog:

• exercise 
• my new menu for next week, and 
• The Trouble with Tribbles. 

(ok, not really that last one. but it popped into my newly-clean mind. what can i say? once a #trekkie, always a #trekkie. you are, after all, at GeekGirlKnows.com, right? :)

(UPDATED) - Day 5 of 14: How a Dietary Cleanse Can Affect PMS and Allergies

EOD UPDATE+FINAL TALLY

this is pretty much how i feel about everything but my cleanse foods right now.

BUT... day 5, first full work-week of cleansing...CHECK! i have survived and i'm ready to face the weekend.

towards the end of the day today i had really crazy tummy troubles (read: that's a total euphemism for something waaaaay grosser.) that lasted for a few hours, and of course, it happened right when i had to get into the car and sit in LA traffic forever.

INFURIATING LA TRAFFIC.

even though i use that app Waze (thank you to Emmett for introducing me to it...it's AMAZING) to avoid traffic, sometimes that is just plain impossible in LA. especially if you are driving the route nearest the most accessible restroom stops (euphemism).

since i've been very regular until now, this was slightly unexpected... i have two theories:

1. it's either supposed to happen because, duh, i'm CLEANSING my body or 
2. it's because of the seared ahi tuna (read: basically raw fish with a thin layer around the outside cooked) that i took from tonight's dinner meal and put into my lunch puree. it also had brown rice and some raw cucumbers and i think a bit of radish in it, so any of those things could have been the culprit. 

and man, i tell ya, it is crazy when you start eating solid food and you can hear it literally moving through your stomach after you've eaten it. i can monitor my entire digestive tract, pretty much. it is a veritable force.

for those of you who didn't read the morning report, scroll down past The Dude dancing in the GIF for depictions of how (surprisingly) this cleanse has lessened normal effects of my allergies and PMS. as Martha Stewart would say, "it's a good thing."

FINAL DAY 5 TALLY:

LBS LOST: 6 (for SURE i've lost at least another half LB due to the EUPHEMISM above)

NUMBER OF PUREES EATEN: 4

NUMBER OF TIMES I'VE SEMI-FREAKED OUT ABOUT WHEN I START HAVING TO PLAN MY OWN MEALS AGAIN IN A WEEK: 8-9 (more about that in my weekend blogs)

hope you all had a great friday, and have a beautiful weekend planned ahead. i will try to "keep busy" as chef Kelly suggested, so wish me luck with surviving the weekend without structure, but full of purees. (oooh, and some scallops! i have yummy scallops for dinner tomorrow. i almost want it to be tomorrow night already just because of that).

cheers!

--MORNING REPORT--

HAPPY FRIDAY, DUDES!

so i woke up today with a pretty severe case of PMS rage in my head. like, so bad that i got annoyed at myself at something i thought about that didn't actually happen, it was just a hypothetical (in case you are interested, it was this whole diatribe i went on in my head about how some people say "that's mines" instead of "that's mine". it's MINE, not MINES! that's a pretty accurate portrayal of how it went in my head too).

then, i got into work and my food delivery for today through sunday wasn't here yet, i was like RAGGGGGGEEEEEEE. in my head. but outwardly, i was like "cool, thanks, i'll check back in like 15 mins!" to the front desk peeps. i'm actually really surprised that i've been pretty even keel this whole week, which is when i'd normally be just slightly bat-shit crazy in my head all the while trying to keep it cool and seem like the same person on the outside. not some hormone-filled impostor clone who took over daria's body. but i guess i couldn't expect it all to go away. but generally speaking, it is remarkable how normal i've felt--better than normal, in fact--all week long considering what's coming next week.

also something good to report: allergies. not that allergies are good...but the fact that i haven't had to use my Afrin nasal spray to clear out my sinuses all week is great. i have been sneezing a bit in the mornings, but i think that's because LA is being hit with the famous, crazy, Santa Ana winds, and that always makes my allergies go haywire. so really, this cleanse has eliminated a lot of the congestion and other crap that i deal with on a weekly basis allergy wise, which is pretty awesome!

no weight lost today...but, to be fair, i weighed myself before you-know-what. sometimes things just don't work out-what can you do? but i'm fairly confident you-know-what was like 1 solid LB so i'm going to just keep that as a small victory in my head, though not official.

also, i did get my delivery as i was writing this post, and chef Kelly is so cute...she sent me some words of encouragement, and here's my menu of solid food for tonight/the weekend:

my favorite thing is the fact that it says "gingerly" sauce. even though i think it's a typo, i love it and it will forever now be called "gingerly" sauce in my heart and mind.

thank you for all of the support on this first week of my journey! you guys have really helped me out just by following along, and i promise i will not disappoint you! and if i do, i will admit it, and we can get through it together. deal? deal. :)

MORNING TALLY:

NUMBER OF LBS LOST: 5.5
NUMBER OF PMS RAGES HAPPENING IN MY HEAD RIGHT NOW: at least 7. (fucking government is shutdown, miley cyrus is SO annoying and it's "YOU'RE" not "YOUR" if you mean "YOU ARE." and there are TWO forms of the word "TO," which mean completely different things. TOO and TO! SHEESH INTERNET!!!)

(UPDATED) Day 4 - 5.5 LBS Lost!

---EOD UPDATE+FINAL TALLY---

today chef kelly checked in with me and asked if i was strictly sticking to the cleanse. at first when she used those words "STRICTLY STICKING" it made me slightly terrified. (then in my head, i free associated for a minute and ended up with "strictly ballroom" and then "strictly d&*#ly" and then i stopped.) i immediately admitted my champagne transgression and my soup switch up debacle the other night, and she said that it was all just fine, and was to be expected. she also told me that by this day on the cleanse, most people lose 4-6 LBS. i'm at 5.5 LBS. i'm right on track! she told me that i'm doing GREAT and to keep it up. she said i should see an even more dramatic loss by sunday.

but most importantly, we talked about how i feel. i told her that i feel so different, it's hard to put it into words if it's "good" or "bad." she responded and said that it IS different...it's called feeling CLEAN. and then she added "and YES, it really is that simple."

so there you have it. my insides are starting to get squeaky clean, and it's pretty awesome. i'm really looking forward to my delivery tomorrow, where i'm going to receive more purees, and then one of chef kelly's most popular meals: seared ahi poke tuna with avocado, brown rice and cucumbers, and some other shit. you had me at avocado. i mean really, i can just eat a whole avocado with some salt and lemon on toast as a meal, and i am a happy camper. no high maintenance here. well, besides this:

you know it is.

so here's the final tally before i go into the final weekday of the first week of my cleanse. i'm not going to lie when i say that this weekend makes me kind of nervous, since i don't have as much of a routine on the weekends as i do during the work week, which leaves more time to be lazy and thus want to snack because i free associate food like i did above with chef kelly in my head. but i'm going into it with an "i can do this, bitches" attitude, and i think that will help, no? at the end of this cleanse, i want to tell it this:

take that, 14 days of soup. i will DESTROY you with my willpower.

FINAL TALLY:

NUMBER OF LBS LOST: 5.5 (hitting my milestones, bizzles, just like a developmental-aged toddler. BOOM.)
NUMBER OF PUREES EATEN: 4
NUMBER OF SOLID MEALS DEVOURED: 1
NUMBER OF HOURS I SPENT SURFING THE WEB FOR REAL HOUSEWIVES GIFS: too many to count/admit in public.
NUMBER OF POOPS: 2.5 (don't ask about the .5)

-----MORNING REPORT----

i know, i know, i said this isn't mainly about the weight loss. but yet, i'm 5.5 lbs down since Monday! that is basically 3 full days of cleansing, which is over 1 lb a day. so that makes me pretty stoked! dance break:

no caption needed.

other things of note:

-SLEEP: i have been sleeping a bit more than normal, and waking up earlier and not being able to go back to sleep, but i am interpreting that as my body not feeling so groggy and cloudy and bogged down with dairy, sugar, etc. i may actually have to actually get out of bed early one of these days rather than trying to make myself lay there and go back to sleep. maybe i could do something in the morning? i dunno...one drastic change at a time, people.

-SKIN: i generally have pretty good skin (#thanksMom!) so i was worried that i would suffer some break outs with this cleanse, as my body was eliminating toxins. this morning, one of my co-workers told me my skin was glowy, and that was awesome.

-FILTER: dude, something has happened to my filter. like the one that is in between my brain and my mouth. you know like when you get a new air filter in your car, and then the AC smells like new-car smell and fake fresh air for a few days? that's how i think my filter is right now, because i am finding myself feeling sharper than normal and kind of saying the first thing that comes to mind in some moments (which, i'm told, i did in a staff meeting this morning. what? i thought it was funny.)

MORNING TALLY:

-LBS LOST: 5.5
-HEADBANGS DONE IN CAR LISTENING TO NIRVANA ON MY WAY INTO WORK TODAY: 17
-NUMBER OF FOOT IN MOUTH MOMENTS IN STAFF MEETING: 2 (or so i'm told. i don't know anymore, i have no filter).

(UPDATED) Day 3 of 14 Day Soup Cleanse: Morning Report+Gratitude Shout Outs

END OF DAY UPDATE:

so today, i learned an important lesson about habit. and about just how little it takes to be happy sometimes.

and, i learned just how quickly your palette can be cleansed without a sorbet. (BTWs, i would donate my spleen for a sorbet right now). since i've basically been the Gerber Baby for 48 hrs straight, i was so excited to get to work today and get my food delivery bag, knowing it'd contain my solid meals to replace 1 puree a day from now until Sunday.

i opened my thermal bag, and looked right past the containers of familiar-looking purees to behold the beauty before me. i SWEAR i heard angels sing, saw a halo and a unicorn ran by in the background. i had in my possession one box with quinoa, shrimp and sugar snap peas, and another box with the tilapia you see below. even though i don't like shrimp, i immediately and with my hand grabbed a shrimp and ate it. cold. i think i'm OK with shrimp now.

the pop of flavor and texture in my mouth was unreal. you'd think i'd been in prison for years like Bridget Jones was in that sequel and that hadn't eaten real food. or that i was like Nell eating a cooked meal for the first time. people, it's only been 2 days! but man, when i picked up a wilted spinach leaf and put it in my mouth, it was like no spinach i'd tasted before. and it wasn't any special kind of spinach... it's just that i had already gotten somewhat used to not eating. simple, pure, joy. it didn't take much. why can't we all slow down and appreciate the little things in life like this every day? oh, right. work. bills. duty. blah blah. well, fuck.

anyway, for lunch i took some spinach and a few chunks of fish and put them in my puree. and can i just say...i didn't feel like i was on a diet or a cleanse. it felt and tasted and satisfied like it was a regular lunch i'd have any other day at work. (at my desk. while working, splattering on my keyboard. but that's a whole other blog, and frankly, we don't have enough time for that.)

my lunch concoction. pure joy.

then, when i came home for dinner tonight, i made sure to lay everything out on a plate and grab a knife and fork and sit down at the table and eat like a lady. except indian-style on the floor at the coffee table. same diff:

baked tilapia, wilted spinach and curried quinoa. yummo!

i savored every last bite, and really enjoyed it. in that moment, i was so happy. so content. and damn skippy i scraped every last kernel (kernel?) of quinoa from my plate with my fork. don't judge.

i didn't scarf it down. and i even had to take a break in between! that's how much my stomach had grown averse to solid food in just 2 days: this meal completely filled me up. i guess you can form new habits...both bad and good, pretty quickly if you are determined and have a support system.

and if you are like me, and your outlet is writing, and if you have a blog and people who care enough about you to read it, any goal you have is pretty much guaranteed success. this whole soup cleanse journey has gotten me back into my writing in a regular way, and even if most of it is about food and like a small part of it is about poop and kanye west, it's writing nonetheless.

and that is another pleasant side effect of this cleanse: it got me to form a great new habit of writing for myself...not for work or for Huffington Post or for emails...but for myself, and for you guys. so, i want to add that to my list of things to be grateful for today. (OH and also on that list...i pooped 3 times today. i can't believe it! how?? i've been eating baby food, remember! oh man, i am SO instantly mortified that i just typed that, and furthermore, if you are reading it, that i didn't delete it before publishing this tonight. i guess they always say to write what you know...)

in summation, i would say that tonight, i am content, full, and looking forward to the shrimp for dinner (and a pop of it in my lunch) tomorrow. this whole soup cleanse thingy isn't so bad after all. i will say that if it weren't for the solid meals, i don't think i could stare down the tunnel at 14 days of this.

DAY 3 TALLY:

LBS LOST: 4
PUREES EATEN: 4
SOLID MEALS EATEN: 1
POOPS: 3
NUMBER OF BRIDGET JONES REFERENCES: 1
NUMBER OF NELL REFERENCES: 1

------------------MORNING UPDATE-----------------
today, on day 3, i am taking a moment to thank the universe for 3 things:

1) the people in my life who always are supportive of and enrich my life, but especially when they help me with little kick starts, like my dear co-worker and friend Chelsea did by leaving this note on my desk this morning:

thank you, Chelsea. this made my day! xoxo

2) the fact that i get to CHEW SOLID FOOD today!

this was in my delivery today. shrimp, quinoa and sugar snap peas YUM! i also got tilapia on wilted spinach with curried quinoa. these are my solid meals for today and tomorrow. 

3) rap music. well, all music. but this morning when i drove into work, i listened to some Kanye and i felt super gangsta. it put me in a good mood. thanks, Kayne, for laying down some sick beats.

BONUS:

NUMBER OF LBS LOST: 4. YES FOUR! since monday. i know it's likely mostly water weight, but it's nice to see that on the scale.

tonight i am going to heat up that Tilapia dish and put it on a real plate and eat it with a fork and knife and maybe light some dinner candles. (it feels like a ceremonial occasion, no?) i will check in then with the tally for the day.

happy hump day, gangstas. make it count.

Poem: An Ode to my Brown, Soupy Lunch

no, this is not poop.

it's merely black bean soup

and it tastes like a chili that's been chewed up already.

i know i'm no dr. seuss,

but i could srsly eat a moose.

(and thing 1 and thing 2 to boot.)

my tongue feels all fuzzy

but i'm sick of bein' chubby

so i'm going to finish this brown soupey soup.

thank you.

(UPDATED) - Day 2: 14 Day Soup Cleanse (2 LBS LOST!)

EVENING UPDATE+A BIG A-HA MOMENT ABOUT FOOD+FINAL TALLY

ok, so... can we all agree that life is about being flexible, and making compromises? yes? ok, good. please remember that when i tell you what i just did.

so yesterday (monday) when i got all my soups delivered at work, i counted out how many i'd be eating at home, and how many at work. since the majority of them were at work, i packed away 4 soups to bring home. i THOUGHT i picked the right combinations (you see there are 4 different columns of soups you pick from when you order your cleanse. one contains your fiber, one contains your iron, one contains your protein, etc. they work as a SYSTEM, people. actually, if you want to see the list, here it is. you basically pick one soup from columns 1 & 2, and then 2 from column 3 and then one from the chilled list.)

anyhow, when i got home late, tired and hungry tonight and VERY much looking forward to eating my cauliflower-garlic puree and then, later, as a night cap, my carrot-ginger puree, i realized the most HORRIBLE thing. yesterday, i accidentally brought home the black bean puree (see my poop? nope it's soup poem here for reference) and the pumpkin puree. and i've already had both of those today. i could not eat them both again, right? so i had one of them, the pumpkin one, and then sat there.

and i thought.

and i thought.

and then, clear as if someone had rung a bell, i remembered what Chef Kelly told me when i was doing my prep work for the cleanse. she said that if i had to go out to an event, that i should go and just be reasonable, and i could have a glass of champagne. just don't overdo it, you know?

so, instead of option 1: driving back to work to pick up the sadly left out purees (which i deeply considered) i went for option 2: i decided to skip my 5th puree all together tonight, and had 1/2 a glass of champagne.

it's liquid, there's no fat (right? i think?) and guess what: i stopped stressing so much. sure, i may have to go to bed early because i'm a bit hungry, and also because i actually can't wait to get into work tomorrow because i will have FOOD TO CHEW ON delivered to me at 8 am (and that is totally not a joke, BTW. i will go into work early for food. is that sick? i dunno, and i don't care.) for posterity's sake, and to keep the rustic nature of this cleanse alive, at least i poured this tiny amount of champagne into a mason jar. mason jars are rustic, right? people put soup in mason jars, no?

i swear it's just the tiny mason jar. 

so, in conclusion, i gave something up, and replaced it with something smaller that i was actually allowed to have even if i had eaten all of my purees. so somehow, i feel like i remained true to the cleanse. also, i'm telling you all about my indiscretion of sorts here, well, because that's why i'm documenting this in a public way. so that i can be accountable to someone...and that someone is YOU guys. SIDEBAR: i can't tell you how great it felt when a few of you reached out to me today personally to tell me you are following the blog and rooting for me. it's actually really helping me get through.

what i've learned so far... is that SO much of food; and preparing, planning, sharing, eating and talking about it is actually EMOTIONAL. am i starving, or deprived of anything right now? not anything that my body needs. which is why it is such a mind-fuck. i just miss it, that's all. it's like a bad friend or relationship. you know it's better for you when they are gone, but damn sometimes you miss something about them. and i miss chewing and choice. the power to consume what i want when i want. and now that i realize that fact, the fact that food controls me more than i think i control it, i've just unlocked the first step to solving the problem. i need to be in charge again, and the only way to do that, is first to deconstruct the whole process, down to basics. and that, ladies and gents, is the whole purpose of a cleanse.

and so, we progress.

so here's the FINAL tally for the day:

THE (UPDATED) TALLY

LBS LOST: still 2 (i won't weigh myself again until morning, so this stays the same)
NUMBER OF PUREES CONSUMED: 4
NUMBER OF GLASSES OF CHAMPAGNE CONSUMED WITH PERMISSION MIGHT I ADD: 1/2

NUMBER OF TIMES I GOT LOST ON MY WAY TO WORK: still just 1. thank god i didn't decide to go back for that puree tonight, eh?

NUMBER OF EPIPHANIES ABOUT THE NATURE OF FOOD: 1 really big one

------------------MORNING UPDATE-----------------

well, i slept and i woke up. so that's something. also, i woke up around 6 am and had to pee - like a lot. i'm sure it's because i'm eating soup 5x a day and then supplementing that with tea and coffee to have SOME sense of flavor in my mouth.

i woke up feeling ok-not quite myself but not completely sluggish and depressed - but definitely subdued. so that's something too. since i usually have coffee and my breakfast at work, i was fine waiting until i got here-like, not starving or craving soup. :/  (oh btw, not sure if this is a side effect of the cleanse, but i got lost on my way to work today. a place i've worked almost 4 years that is like 20 mins from my house. so, that happened too.) and, just to add a photo of NOT soup to this post, i just googled "lost" and of course got way too many images from the ABC show. and i was trying to skip over them to find a good image of LOST in the traditional sense, but then i came across this photo of Kate from LOST in sparkly underwear and thought "god, i want my butt to look like that" and somehow, i feel like that applies here-both for the 2 lbs i LOST and because i got LOST on my way to work. so here's Kate from LOST wearing sparkly underwear with her great ass:

i mean, who doesn't want their butt to look like that?

i'm eating my pumpkin soup for breakfast now, and hopefully i will have some more energy after this and my cuppa joe.

on a good front, (and for those of you who are faint of heart when it comes to talking about bodily functions, just leave now), i woke up and went to the bathroom (which i hadn't all day yesterday) and then weighed myself (you know you ALL do that. we all know we weigh, like, at LEAST 1 lb less after we poop. #amirite?) and i've lost about 2 lbs! woot woot. so that's exciting.

i keep telling myself that the weight loss of this cleanse will be the desirable side effect of it, and that the main goal is to get healthy and cleanse out my system, but even i know that it's prolly more weighted the other way around. (HA get it? weighted? i mean... i think i'm funnier when i'm hungry. or maybe just more blunt.)

THE (MORNING) TALLY

LBS LOST: 2

NUMBER OF TIMES I GOT LOST ON MY WAY TO WORK: 1

NUMBER OF SHOWS THAT ARE AS GOOD AS LOST WAS: 1 (and it's Breaking Bad, mo-fos. which i dare to say was even better than LOST. BOOM.)

stay tuned for updates, and remember you can post comments, questions, jokes and words of encouragement below without having to sign in! i have an open comments system just so that it makes it easier for you all to communicate with me. so have at it!

click below to read:
SOUP CLEANSE DAY 1 BLOG
SOUP CLEANSE PREP WORK BLOG